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Here Comes Fatty Clause 
By: Rudolph & The Gang
Play Sample:
Rank this week: 29 (↑48)
Duration: 2:30 
Release Date: 1982  (TocomKari) 
Lyrics By: Johnny MacRae (Stavro Arrgolus) 
Music By: Johnny MacRae (Stavro Arrgolus) 
Produced By:
Released By: Yuletide U-12033 (Stavro Arrgolus) 
Published By:
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There has always been 'anti-Christmas' music. It's dementia by default. A lot of it is lowbrow and/or low quality. This can be classified as a lowbrow tune of good quality. It's kind of catchy and might have gotten more airplay if not for the language. It nails the main 'anti-Santa' theme found in these sorts of songs. Namely, the post-Xmas 'absence of cash' thing and blaming the fat 'bearded weirdie' for the bills rather than say...demanding, spoiled children.- Stavro Arrgolus
  • There's no "E" in "Claus". It was misspelled on the original single version. (Stavro Arrgolus)
  • Also included on the album "A John Waters Christmas". All the songs on this compilation album were picked by Waters himself. (Stavro Arrgolus)
  • Song Lyrics:
    Oh, here comes fatty with his sacka ****
    Here comes fatty with his sacka ****
    Here comes fatty with his sacka ****
    And all them stinkin' reindeer

    Well, I believe in Santa Claus
    Yeah, I believe that he's a prick
    And though he comes but once a year
    It's enough to make me sick

    Him an' his Christmas spirit
    Are really a lotta bunk
    I'll have to bust my *** for another year
    Just to pay for all this junk


    ('Elves' whistling chorus)

    Elf: Oh boy, here he comes. Oh, ****! Back to work!

    Well, I believe in Santa
    though he's got me in a mess
    'Cause I'm over the limit on my MasterCharge
    and my Visa and American Express

    Well, I'm a-sweatin' an' grievin'
    'Bout this money mess I'm in
    He'll be up there sittin' on his BIG FAT ***
    Until Christmas comes again


    Oh, here comes fatty with his ho ho hos
    And there my money all go go goes
    I'd like to punch him in his big red nose
    And he'd wish he never came here


    Here's to all you mothers and fathers,
    grandmas and grandpas, aunts and uncles.
    Anyone who's ever been pushed and shoved,
    kicked and beaten, scratched and clawed
    doing your last minute Christmas shopping.
    Here's to everyone who's ever been
    sucked in by those crummy TV commercials
    that tell you if you don't spend 500 bucks
    on your kids, you're a cheap slob.
    Here's to all those ruptured bank accounts
    and battered credit cards.
    You know it happens every time that fat little
    bastard in the red suit shows up.
    Here's to all of you. This is your song
    So come on and let's get into the spirit!


    ©1982 Johnny MacRae

    (Stavro Arrgolus)
    Current Rating 9.4 (4 votes)
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