Herbert the Homicidal Turkey  By: Joe J. Thomas

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Duration:	2:58 (Stavro Arrgolus)
Release Date:	11/16/2013
Lyrics By:	Joe J. Thomas
Music By:	Joe J. Thomas (Stavro Arrgolus)
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Licensing:	CC (DJ Particle)
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Song Lyrics:

— Intro by Motif — Now you all know all the standard holiday stories, but let this old bluesman tell you a tale you ain’t never heard… this here’s the story of Herbert the Homicidal Turkey – Let’s light ‘er up, boys! Tired of being eaten, he was fed up to here Knocked over a gun shop and loaded with gear He’s leavin’ this world on a wing and a prayer Talk about guts, he had giblets to spare The things I seen you won’t believe I’m talkin’ Herbert the Homicidal Turkey A gobblin’ fool, with feathers a flyin’ If he could go like this then he don’t mind dyin’ With bullets and bombs it was a mean turkey run Like Arnold and Stallone rolled into one People were scared, they started to flee From Herbert the Homicidal Turkey Stole a gold cadillac, police gave chase No holiday parade, it was a crazy race No mistakin’ he knew the score Outrunnin’ the law with a four on the floor Tires were screechin’, was a sight to see That Herbert the Homicidal Turkey This bird weren’t stuffed, but he was a packin’ Police were mad that bird was attackin’ They shot at his wheels with all they had Run afoul of the law and that was bad End of the day it was destiny For Herbert the Homicidal Turkey His ride caught fire, that caddy was toasted He was a feared that he would be roasted Jumped outta that car, took his final stand Raised a wing and flipped the bird at the man They tackled and knocked him off his feet Poor Herbert the Homicidal Turkey They locked him away in the poultry asylum But he busts out to keep turkeys from fryin’ Makin’ your holiday menu plan Better stick to chicken or maybe canned spam You hear knockin’, wonder who could it be It’s just Herbert the Homicidal Turkey — Outro by Motif — Now who’s that at the door? Oh! Hello Herbert… I was just singin’ about you. No, no – nothin’ bad. I swear! I’d love to have you for dinner – er, I mean would you like to have dinner with me? Uh, maybe we could just eat some tofu… (Stavro Arrgolus)

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Played on 7 shows:
	11-22-20, #OTR-6-7		11-27-13, #ISGD-13-50
	11-23-18, #WOTR_112		11-23-13, #AOTA-131123
	11-25-15, #ISGD-15-52		11-22-13, #MMDT20_13-47
	11-25-14, #BWR-14-11-25
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