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Song Details
The Presidents 
By: Jonathan Coulton
Play Song (Creative Commons License):
Click Here for a Free Download of this song at 128k
Rank this week: 48 (↓1)
Duration: 4:09 
Release Date: 4/28/2006  (Stavro Arrgolus) 
Lyrics By: Jonathan Coulton (Stavro Arrgolus) 
Music By: Jonathan Coulton (Stavro Arrgolus) 
Produced By: Jonathan Coulton (Stavro Arrgolus) 
Released By: Jonathan Coulton (Stavro Arrgolus) 
Published By:
Licensing: CC 
Keywords:
Reviews:
Facts:
  • Following the 2008 election, renditions of the song were updated to "W's reign of terror's finally over; Obama is pretty excellent so far." (Stavro Arrgolus)
  • Garfield (the President, not the cat) was assassinated in 1881, not 82, so JoCo had to revise the lyrics a bit: The date was corrected in one line, so another was revised to "General Grant thought getting drunk was fun" to make it all fit. (Stavro Arrgolus)
  • Song Lyrics:
    Washington came first and he was perfect
    John Adams kept us out of war with France
    Jefferson made a Louisiana Purchase
    In 1812 James Madison kicked the British in the pants
    James Monroe told Europe they could suck it
    John Quincy Adams looked just like his Dad
    Andrew Jackson got rid of all the Indians
    Van Buren served one term but he wasn't bad

    William Henry Harrison died early
    John Tyler annexed Texas from Mexico
    James K. Polk fought Mexico to keep it
    Taylor was a Mexican War hero
    Filmore gave a boat to Commodore Perry
    Pierce repealed the Missouri Compromise
    Buchanan saw the Civil War's beginnings
    Lincoln saved the Union, then he died

    Andrew Johnson just survived impeachment
    General Grant enjoyed a drink or two
    Rutherford B. Hayes ended reconstruction
    Garfield was assassinated in 1882
    Arthur suspended Chinese immigration
    Cleveland made the railroad people squirm
    Harrison signed the Sherman Anti-Trust Act
    Grover Cleveland served another term

    McKinley kept the Spanish out of Cuba
    Roosevelt was handy with a gun
    Taft was big and fat and had a mustache
    Wilson kicked some ass in World War I
    Harding said let's laissez faire with business
    Coolidge made the roaring 20's roar
    Hoover screwed the pooch in the Great Depression
    Roosevelt beat the Nazis in the war

    Truman dropped the bomb on Hiroshima
    Eisenhower kept the commies well in hand
    Kennedy was killed by a magic bullet
    Johnson murdered kids in Vietnam
    Nixon was a sweating filthy liar
    Ford gave Nixon pardon for his crimes
    Carter lusted in his heart for peanuts
    Reagan won the Cold War and lost his mind

    George Bush senior poked at Saddam Hussein
    Clinton gave an intern a cigar
    W's legacy's a work in progress
    That is all the presidents so far
    In the year 2005 we're out of money
    Somewhere surely freedom's on the march
    I don't like to make political statements...
    (Stavro Arrgolus)
    The Presidents--Jonathan Coulton(View Larger)

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    Current Rating 8.3 (3 votes)
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