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Song Details
Duration: 5:24 
Release Date: 2003  (sfjpk30) 
Lyrics By: The Ballad Of Optimus Prime (meateater1974) 
Music By: The Ballad Of Optimus Prime (meateater1974) 
Produced By:
Released By:
Published By:
Licensing: ASCAP  #503073650 
Keywords:
Reviews:
Facts:
  • The line "Spike cursed to the skies but it was edited later" referred to Spike saying, "Oh, s***!" at one point in the theatrical release of the original "Transformers" movie in 1986...but that the curse word was edited out of the original video release of the film. (ChrisWolvie)
  • Song Lyrics:
    (16 measure intro)

    To this planet called Earth came a pacifist being
    And his clan, who taught us things aren't always as seemed.
    There was no one as wise and courageous and swell,
    As the space hero whose tale I'm about to tell.
    Took his troops into battle to fight all their foes.
    Leading good against evil, and everyone knows
    When his back's 'gainst the wall and he'd run out of luck,
    He'd flip his body parts 'round and change into a truck.

    (chorus)
    Now I'll sing you the ballad of Optimus Prime.
    He was the greatest Transformer there were of all time.
    He was a big rig, a robot, and a really nice guy.
    He was proof that a hero's more than meets the eye.

    (4 measure instrumental break)

    Born Orion Pax back on ol' CyberTron,
    Well not born, more like built by some darn Quintesson.
    After a needed upgrade from Alpha Trion,
    The Leadership Matrix to him was passed on.
    It was each Autobot versus Decepticon,
    And their leader, that vicious gun called MegaTron.
    In a space dogfight race to find more Energon,
    It was our ancient planet that they crashed upon.

    (spoken)
    Earl: Uh, what's a 'pon'?
    Luke: No no no, not a 'pon'. "Upon."
    Earl: Whaaa?
    Luke: You know, like, "Upon far, over there…"
    Earl: Hooo! There's a PON-FAR going on over there?!?
    Luke: No no no no! Wrong universe! Let's just get back to the song!
    Earl: Oh, damn!

    They were brought back online in 1984,
    Reconfigured to blend in with Chevys and Fords.
    Fighting evil on Earth, to this credo they stick, it's
    Freedom for all beings, and avoid parking tickets.
    Prime fought Megatron many times, and it rocked!
    As a pistol, he was always going off half-cocked.
    And when Prime's fisticuffs had been takin' it's tollin'
    He'd shove his long barrel up Prime's Semi colon.

    (spoken)
    Luke: Now that's what I call taking it up the tailpipe!
    Earl: Ooohh! Luke, that pun was so bad it makes me want to... throw myself into the... the Grand Canyon!
    Luke: So that would make you a Cliff-Jumper?
    Earl: Aw, Jeez! One more like that, and I will blast you from here to the Loch Ness.
    Luke: Well, that's a Grim-Lock!… Oh, come on Earl, you're a filk star, you can handle it!
    Earl: Luke, it's enough to make any Star-Scream!
    Luke: (As StarScream:) PATHETIC FOOLS!!! THERE IS NO ESCAPE!!!

    Then in 2005, they fought their final bout.
    With his last ounce of strength, he knocked MegaTron out.
    On his death bed poor Optimus Prime there was laid,
    Just so Hasbro could sell the new toys they had made.
    Then the optics went dim on that great space invader.
    Spike cursed to the skies, but it was edited later.
    The new prophesized leader, Hot Rod, he was chosen.
    We wanted John Wayne, and they gave us Judd Nelson!

    (chorus with The Nick Atoms singing along)

    (4 measure instrumental break)

    (The Nick Atoms sing "Ooooh..."s in background)
    Hot Rod versus Galvatron ain't quite the same.
    Even those who loved them thought it was comparatively lame.
    So we mourned for the deaths of our brave fighting robots.
    The alternative? Go home and play with some… GO-BOTS?!?!?!

    (spoken in unison, yelling in agony)
    Luke: NOOO!!! NOT LEADER-ONE! TURBO! CY-KILL! THAT SCOOTER THING! OH MY GOD! UNICRON KILL ME NOW!!!…
    Earl: OOOOH, NOOOO!!! NOOO NOOO! OH MY- …TONKA COULDN'T SELL ANYTHING BUT A DUMP TRUCK 'CAUSE THEY HAD TO MAKE THESE KNOCK-OFFS! Oh my god!
    …Gobotron my ass!

    Resurrected by forces they don't understand.
    A powerful hate plague they call "fan-demand"
    From his grave-ship soon Optimus Prime then arose
    To save us from lame toys with lamer kid's shows.
    Those Headmaster/Beast Machines might confuse me,
    But with Prime back in charge, it's all good, you'll agree.
    Now immortal, his red and bold chassis is seen
    On DVD, eBay, and Toyfare magazine!

    (chorus with "The Nick Atoms" singing along:)
    Now, I'll sing you the ballad of Optimus Prime.
    He was the greatest Transformer there were of all time.
    He was a big rig, a robot, and a really nice guy.
    He was proof that a hero is…
    (to Transformer Theme Music Riff)
    …MORE THAN MEETS THE EYE!!!

    (spoken)
    Luke: Autobots! Transform and roll out!
    (Transform Sound Effect with his voice)
    (Sonic SBL)
    HyperLink  
    Current Rating 9.2 (3 votes)
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