1)
When I wake for the day
Wipe the cobwebs away
and I see the reverse reflection of
my self in the mirror
and it's just as I fear
my hair it towers up above

I can't explain it, no I don't know what to say
Maybe I'll cut my Bangs, Get a Purple Toupe

So i go to the sink
And my brain starts to think
Maybe I'll just go wet it down
Get a comb and attack
slick all my hair back
But still I look like Emmet Brown

Pre-Chorus:
No matter what i do (I can't control my hair and the things it tells me to do)
People always stare (upon my head it looks like Mad Scientist Hair)

Chorus:
I am filled with despair
And I wish I weren't there
when they all stop and stare
At my Mad Scientist Hair

2)
So I go for a walk
And my hair starts to talk
and to me this doesn't seem quite right
All the women I scare
Birdies nest in my hair
and I think of William Allen White

I look like i was just caught in a brain storm
when a brain hit my head, now that's just not the norm

To my shrink I will vent
about my growing hair dent
But she just can not concentrate
Maybe Jupiter's rings
or some third other thing
that has decided my hair's fate

pre-chorus
I can't seem to drive (my hair it blocks my vision when I'm at the wheel)
I think it is alive (It talks, it thinks, and shows me feelings I should feel)

Chorus:
I am filled with despair
And I wish I weren't there
when they all stop and stare
At my Mad Scientist Hair
But it just isn't fair
I've got no hats to wear
they tell me no, au contrair
It's just Mad Scientist Hair

BRIDGE 
I might shave my head
I'm better off dead

3)
Maybe I will move on
Visit that new salon
And get some product to maybe hold it down
The label I start to read
and I cannot believe
it contains netabolic litrazoung

Pre-chorus
I'm making frantic calls ('cause static e-lec-tricity sticks me to my walls)
My hair just won't behave (but it's a place to keep my wallet so it's safe)

Chorus:
Maybe I shouldn't care
when others stop and they stare
my hair is beyond compare
It's my Mad Scientist Hair
I find it really quite rare
Maybe I will shave it bare
But only a double dare
will stop my Mad Scientist Hair
It rises through the air
and it hangs down to there
and it's shape is quite square
Oh, my Mad Scientist Hair

(c) 2010 Idolize W.A.Y. Recordings/Insane Ian. All Rights Reserved. (Insane Ian)