Ghost County, U.S.A. by Travesty, Ltd.

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Ghost County, U.S.A.
By: Travesty, Ltd.

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Song Lyrics:

I was thumbin' through an empty stretch of Highway 61
When a semi stopped and a voice boomed out, "Climb on up here, son"
so I thanked the lord and got on board, and much to my surprise
The driver was a midget, about one-third my size

He said, "Howdy, I'm Dub Dudley, and I'm hauling toxic waste"
He took a swig from a fifth of Jacks and offered me a taste
And though his head just barely cleared the top of the steerin' wheel
He didn't need to see that much; he drove that rig by feel

Well, we passed the time by singin' every song that driver knew
It didn't take us all that long - he could only remember two
Then we came upon a diner, and he braked the rig real slow
Said, "This here's the end of the line, friend - 'fraid you'll have to go"

(Bye-bye)

So I climbed on down and turned around and said, "Partner, it's been real"
He threw me a counterfeit twenty, said, "Buy yourself a meal"
So I thanked him much, and went inside and ordered up some grub
Said, "I just rode with a midget trucker by the name of Dub"

(Aw-oooh)

Well, you coulda heard a pin drop, and I swear I think I did
Waitress finally broke the spell to say, "You listen, kid
You may think you're bein' funny, but you're just talkin' trash
Dub Dudley died five years ago in an awful fiery crash"

(Oh nooo)

Well, I just sat there starin'. I couldn't believe my ears
'Cause drivin' with the undead is one of my basic fears
I threw the twenty at the plate and got myself outside
I ran into the darkness, lookin' for a place to hide

(Ah, whaaa)

Sheriff finally found me, I was shakin' in a ditch
He said, "Son, you're drunk or crazy, and I mean to find out which"
I shouted, "I ain't neither, I'm just a mite upset
'Bout that all-night diner, and a trucker I just met"

(Out there my side)

Sheriff led me to his car and he didn't say a word
Finally muttered softly, "I guess you haven't heard
That diner burned right to the ground five years ago this night
I was first one on the scene -- lordy, what a sight"

(Oh, no)

"Some crazy trucker'd lost control and drove his rig right through
Place went up like an atom bomb...not much I could do
The toxic waste and burger grease sure were awful smellin'
Soon as they met, the chain reaction was just like Mount St. Helens"

(Ka-boom)

We drove a spell in silence, then he turned and said,
"You ain't the first to have a meal at the Diner of The Dead"
I jumped out of that cruiser and landed in the road
Sheriff kept right on rollin', never even slowed

(So looong)

Then I saw a tractor with a farmer and his wife
I was never so glad to see someone before in all my life
I told 'em 'bout the diner, and what the sheriff said
Well, they stared like I was crazy--
"Sheriff Taylor's dead"

Hmmmm...

"He died the night the diner blew, way back in '63
The flames died down, we looked around, but only found his knee
A noxious cloud was formed that night, forty acres wide
And everyone who breathed its fumes, coughed up blood and died"

Well, I was breathin' heavy as that farmer spun his tale
My hands were cold and clammy, my face was drawn and pale
I screamed, "Ain't there no one still a-livin' in this place?"
He just stood there with an evil grin on his face

(Ah-ha-ha-haaaa)

Then the farmer and his missus started tearin' at my skin
Oh, no - they must be zombies! Somedays, I just can't win

Now I'm dead, like all the others
And I'm warnin' you, stay away
'Cause once you're here, you'll never leave
Ghost County, U.S.A.

Ghost County, U.S.A.
Ghost County, U.S.A.
Ghost County, U.S.A.
(Ghost County)
Ghost County, U.S.A. (Backwoods)

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*Available on the following albums:*
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*Played on 9 shows:*
	10-26-16, #ISGD-16-44	10-21-01, #01-42
	10-04-15, #BWR-15-10-04	10-24-99, #99-43
	10-30-11, #LCBR_Ep052	10-25-98, #98-43
	10-23-10, #10-43	10-26-97, #97-43
	10-25-09, #MMCZ-09-39
	= Show you can listen to online

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